The Fall of Rome...

Reactions to my last post were interesting. There were comments more on the contemplation (e.g. prayer, meditation, etc...) portion than the rest, which I find interesting. There are questions of whether or not it is nessasary, and I would say that I believe so. Defiantely in your own manner though. To speak Sanskrit has very little meaning if it means little to you. In the same vein, to use some "established" method, if it means little to you, is of little if any use.

However I think that assuming that its just always back there or present in your mind is a little short sighted, unless you have already established whatever relationship you want to the fullest of levels. An analogy would be that a sports star doesn't stop training and expect to be able to perform at the same level. They can generally recover more quickly, as they were further along to begin with, but don't stop once they reach the top... at least not if they want to stay there.

Regarding those that don't think or can't, is it unacceptable to ask someone you regard as your better to make your decisions for you... no, but it is somewhat irresponsible. More because people in those positions of power inevitibly (mabye over the course of several generations as in the case of kingdoms and empires) take advantage of those they are leading.

There are definately sheep in this world that need to be herded, there are defainately shepards that like/need/want to do the herding. What I find quite often is that there are some people that think, and find themselves more in the role of the sheep dog. They'll try and be helpful and obey what sounds right, but they won't disregard their own instincts.

It's these people (of which I count myself as one) that are the least understood by both sides, and therefore the most dangerous to both situations. They don't want to lead the sheep, but they might want to make them think, and if they think any different from the shepard there will be problems (mabye not violent, but in some way shape or form). However I believe they are absloutely nessasary for any kind of reform and to keep the shepards in line from time to time. A difficult but seemingly naturally occuring balancing act.

Regarding other religions being valid, I would go back to saying that it probably doesn't matter. What they do matters, how they go about doing it matters, whether or not a human avatar of God or some alien told them to do it is kind of a moot point in the end.

I do hold a strong feeling however that any belief system that requires enforcement or excessive persuasion is not valid. I think no religion is "true" or even has the right to exist (change that, has the right to be called a religion or have anything to do with "faith") that can not be freely chosen, and more importantly, unchosen, without any major side effects.

By side effects I mean punishment in a physical, mental, or monetary way to you or those arround you in an effort to have you come back. It should stand on its own merits without human intervetion (and no this isn't an attack on any given religion, they have all done it, and I don't think it was part of the dogma that did it, it was more evidence of strayed shepards...).

And that I believe covers that part. If there is more, please comment again (or in regards to the new portion) and I will attempt to address them.

Second to address the topic of fall... my feelings on it are that it is an entirely evil thing to people like me. I have had a sore throat for about 3 weeks now. The constant rain with continual front changes aggervates the hell out of my arthritis and sinuses.

Yes the leaves may be nice, but the nice wet piles of them create molds that attack my respatory system for weeks on end and I would be much happier without it. Aside from the fact that this is when the sky turns grey with fair regularity, but doesn't have the stark contrast and feeling that it's supposed to be this way that winter does.

Fall and to a lesser extent spring (when everything blooms, although the mold and dust of fall seem worse... mabye just because it's generally cold as well) are cursed seasons to me :-p

Now then, on the requested topic of relationships.

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Wow, this is an impossible topic... Next!

Ok, ok, I'll make an attempt.

Platonic relationships are complicated enough, nonplatonic relationships involve an entirely different set of viewpoints and problems. There is quite a bit more at stake. Pulling out of a platonic relationship just results in the loss of a person to hang and share with on a given level (depending on the length/depth of the relationship).

Nonplationic relationships bring in other difficult to address items. Physicality is just one of the minor additions. Yes, everyone by human instinct is looking for a potential mate to spread genes and whatnot. However by human standards nowadays, when you begin to engage in a nonplatnoic relationship, the question constantly comes up... is this person a potential LIFE mate. As in for life. Like forever.

This is not nessasiarly a bad way to approach this. There are tendancies in platonic friends that you may not like that you are perfectly willing to overlook given that they are not supposed to be sharing in part of you for the rest of your conciousness. Now they are being analyzed and scrutinized heavily for anything that might possibly be wrong.

This brings up another major issue. Nobody's perfect. We all have flaws. I would think that the perfect people would etiher be abhorrently booring, or would be killed out of envy quite quickly. How can you possibly commit your life to someone that has flaws? Some people say that nice line of "well they're perfect for me". I call bullshit! I think it would behoove people to realize that everyone is going to give you some grief sometime, it's just are you willing to put up with it.

Leading into... do you even want to have some type of life mate? If there is absloutely no one in this world that you are willing to put up with (eventually) 100% of the time, then stop looking for someone to spend your life with and you will probably be happier. I personally don't think there are many people like this out there, given the extremes most people will go through for family members just to show an example.

There are so many points that can be made here, and my hands are starting to get tired, so I will cover a few of the things I found during my relationships, and see if that offers any insight.

One thing I have found is that you have to be your own person. To say that someone completes you means that you have to have them arround to be real. You are dependent, and therefore you are not on a level playing field. If that person is a nice addition to your life, and you help each other to open new doors or new experiences that's fine. But they can't be things that you couldn't have done on your own given the time, and inclination. You can lean on them when you really need to, but don't make it a habit.

Another thing I have found is that most fights are not between you and the other person. They are between you and yourself. It's much easier to attribute your failings or something going wrong in your life to someone/something/anything than to accept it as you and move on about fixing it.

Those times when you are not in a relationship, and you feel down, you will feel those in a relationship as well. It's important to remember that it's probably not the other person's fault. Unless it directly is (which is possible), in which case it needs to be addressed immatedtly, and in no uncertain terms, or the relationship needs to be terminated. When I say things like this it is not a "they leave the toilet seat in " it is a they insult me to feel better, they beat me, they force (whether mentally or physically) to do things I don't want, etc... Something deep and abusive, not cosmetic or trivial.

If it is your own issue, and you realize it as such, that person can be a great help in getting you through it. That's one of the truly neat parts of a relationship. Unconditional love, freely given, with no restraint. It makes you more vunerable than anything in the world ever will ever, period, hands down.

However, when it's right, and you give yourself freely and are received freely, it is the most elating feeling ever. It will make everything better. Not fix everything, but more like being hypersensitive to the good stuff. You've never tasted something so good, even though you could swear you've tasted it a thousand times before. So at least there are some good things :-p

This could be installment one, or it could be all anyone wants to hear, or all that should be discussed in public. Comments are the way to let me know people! They help me keep this thing up. I seem to be more on a twice a month track than a once a week, but it's better than nothing right?

I noticed that I used you alot in this one. That is not representitive of someone specific, but just the generalized you as a reader/entity of coherent thought :-)

Are you pondering what I'm pondering Pinky? I think so Brain, but how do you put roller skates on the giraffe?